We have a rather large brush pile up at our land, made up of all the trees and foliage that were removed to make our driveway and clearing.

It has been sitting there drying for about 2 years now and ready to burn. So, I’ve spent a lot of my day feeding the large bonfire.

Not only will this help get rid of the unsightly brush pile, but it will also create a lot of ash–ash I plan to scatter on the driveway to discourage plants and grass from growing (meaning less to mow).

As I’ve been tending this fire, I’ve also been reading from my Bible and a book titled “Leading from the Second Chair” by Mike Bonem and Roger Patterson.

I’m maybe a quarter of the way through the leadership book, and so far,  I’ve come to two realizations: 1) I wish I would have read this book years ago. And 2) I’m feeling rather convicted of how I conducted myself in ministry. Much like the pile of ashes I’m creating, I sit in dust and ashes, wishing to repent of my insubordination and my lack of honoring God’s authority in submitting to his ordering.

In Job 42:1-6 it says this: Then Job answered the Lord and said: “I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted. ‘Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?’ Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know. ‘Hear, and I will speak; I will question you, and you make it known to me.’ I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear but now my eye sees you; therefore I despise myself, and repent in dust and ashes.” (Emphasis mine.)

Yeah, me too, Job. Me too.

The book has been referencing Joseph’s story of being in the “second chair” in relation to his family (second to last born) and his position servicing Potiphar. Thankfully, Joseph was able to repent, and learn, and apply important lessons as he grew and matured in his life.

And, thankfully, we all have that same opportunity in our walks of faith. 1 John 1:6-7 reminds us, “If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.”

Thank God for that.